Monday, May 3, 2010

A Homecoming - Teaser Tuesday

So, after a long drought, lots of staring at words and, finally sending what I'd written to the lovely Amy Bai for a little advice, I've finally returned to Fin and Angharad's story. I churned out 4,000 words on Sunday and spent some of Monday, tidying up and rearranging things. I'm still not sure where this is going. I have a rough idea and I'm not ready to abandon them, because I'm quite fond of Fin. :)

Anyway, this is part of the 4k marathon. Fin has been away, summoned to the north of the Kingdom of Dumfries to see his dying father. Angharad had more or less given up on him returning. She's about to get a happy surprise.

For the record: Minn sal is Old Norse for 'my soul', minn astir is 'my love' and minn kona 'my wife'. Angharad only knows the meaning of the latter.

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For a moment, everything else disappeared, lost in silence. The fire was a dim flicker and Angharad looked at her husband, drenched and pale. His eyes were dark and unreadable.

“Minn sal.” His voice was a whisper.

“Husband.” She wasn’t sure the word left her mouth. She ran across the hall, a rustle of straw and a whisper of skirts and hurled herself into his open arms.

“Angharad, minn astir.” His grip was fierce. His heart pounded against her breast.

Angharad thought he’d break her in two. She took a deep breath and held onto him. “I missed you. I thought you were never coming home.”

“I’m sorry.” His voice shook. His breath was warm against her skin and his hands brushed her veil away. “I’ll never leave you again, minn kona.”

She wanted to cry. Instead she kissed his cold cheek. “See that you don’t.”

“Never.” He stepped back and Angharad returned his gaze.

“You need feeding,” she said, touching his face. “You’re too thin.” The dark crescents beneath his eyes were like bruises.

“I need you.” There was fire in his voice.

“You have me,” she replied.

9 comments:

  1. Ooh, love that ending! Really like the way you add in touches of the language, too. Gives it a nice sense of grounding.

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  2. So much passion. I felt their emotion. Great job.

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  3. I love the last lines. The little details are great and the connection between the characters comes through.

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  4. wow. as usual you really capture the emotions between these two. i love the crescents beneath his eyes line. and also the she wasn't sure the word left her mouth. what a way to say that. nice job.

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  5. Thanks, everyone!
    I was really flagging with this, but I've found a way forward. I really didn't want to leave them hanging without a plot!

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  6. Great reunion. Those last two lines show a lot of promise for what could come next. ;)
    Always a sucker for a man that really missed his woman.

    K. Taylor

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  7. You do such a wonderful job of engaging the reader, transporting us to any time and place in a way that look effortless. Love the dynamic here between the two. Look forward to more!

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  8. Sue, you are so great with romance, the deep "real" kind of romance that every person wants in their life. You really rock at the scenes where the 2 characters "connect". Every teaser of yours I've read this past year shows that.

    I could picture the whole scene in my head.

    xoxo -- Hilary

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  9. Thank you, KT, Jen and Hilary!
    I'm glad the chemistry between the two of them works. It really did start off as a 'marriage of convenience' and is turning into something deeper. They'll both 'get it' in time. :)

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